I have long pondered over the identity crisis that is Passover. We know this is a happy holiday but, why do we remember and reenact so much that was sad?
We celebrate a feast called a Seder while eating poor people’s tasteless bread called Matzah. We are commanded to eat roasted meats and drink four cups of wine while reclining, all signs of festivity yet, we dip vegetables in saltwater and must eat bitter herbs.

In Judaism, we cannot appreciate freedom unless we remember what slavery was for our ancestors. We cannot partake in a feast without tasting the bitterness of the journey that led to our independence today. In Judaism, we cannot arrive without the sweat and tears of the journey.

This identity crisis perfectly symbolizes my feelings over this past year living through a pandemic. I am pained by the loss of life, the illness, the emotional and physical toll this pandemic has taken on businesses, industries along with families, and communities. Grandparents who cannot hold their children coupled with kids who cannot attend school and valued rites of passages, like prom, Israel trips, and B’nai Mitzvah denied have caused real loss and sadness. It hurts our collective heart. These are all saltwater and horse-radish for our soul.

Yet, at the same time, family units have bonded closer than ever before. We have a new appreciation for health, life, and those who tend to the care of the ill and elderly. This time has reminded us of what matters most in life. By staying home, wearing masks, and taking precautions we are reminded how seemingly small acts by each and every person help shape our world for the better. We have put consumerism and chasing materialism by the wayside and focused on relationships. We have replaced valuables with values.  Technology has tethered us to work, family and community and created new rituals that will continue long past Covid. This is the four-cups of wine and feast for our spirit.

Sometimes, I imagine in prayer form,  that God will grant me health and years and that I will be able to have grandchildren sit at my feet and ask me what it was like to live through a pandemic. I anticipate them asking me how terrible it was and I hope to be able to say, it was terrible and it was beautiful, all at the same time. Just like Passover and so much of our tradition. After all, if we cannot feel pain, we will never know what joy feels like. If we only eat the sweetness of the Haroset, we will have no appreciation for the Marror – bitter herbs. And if we only feast on roasted meats and wine, we cannot appreciate the challenges of our ancestors and our encounters that tried our bodies and resolve.

I pray this Passover, better than last year but not as sweet as year’s previous, will be filled with honey and appreciation for the stinger of the bee; an ability to taste and appreciate the sweetness of the  Haroset and the bitterness of the Marror which all enable us to find better balance and appreciate the arc that is our history and our shared future.

Shabbat Shalom and Happy Passover.

Rabbi David-Seth Kirshner